25 December 2014


Sometimes I still catch myself in disbelief that all of this happened – that I’m married to this amazing man and that every day I love him more and more.


“رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا”











In case anyone was wondering,

Catering: Warisan Baiduri

Wedding decor: Enrich Wedding

Bride Outfits: Tia Fira Bridal

MUA: Nabiha Badjenid (nikah, reception) Munira Hmz (Bertandang)

Bridemaids attire: Jainas Roshim

Official Photographer: WSVS (nikah), Omaroza (Reception), Hafizudin Hamdan (Bertandang)

Official videographer: Nik Aizu (nikah)

Cake deco: Hellotreats_KL

Handbouquet: Ummi

Henna: hennabyHana

Shoes: Christy Ng

Butterfly week

The Holidays have started and I intend to make the most of them. This week has been filled with activities, going out and socializing and meeting people and going places and doing things. not my average week, but definitely enjoyable 😀

4-7 June – Pulau Perhentian Kecil

more pics below 🙂 most perhentian pics from rahsia studio and phy

A lot of uncertainty building up to the trip but boy was everything worth it. From ramai jadi sikit until I was the only girl then nego2 til there were 5 girls on board. I didn’t know what to expect from Perhentian, of course there are those glossy tourism pictures but I’ve been let down by advertorial images too many times to believe what I saw on the internet.

But Perhentian was really really breathtakingly beautiful Masha’Allah. Air macam lumion. And it was nice to not have to be the one organizing things, as I’m very prone to doing. can’t really help it…I just like making the most out of my travels. like when we went to Hong Kong and Melbourne, no one else seemed to know where they wanted to go but I researched the hell out of everything, and Alhamdulillah, both trips were quite enjoyable. But I digress.

Perhentian was delayed a few times, because the days leading up to it were jam-packed full of finishing up thesis reports and external portfolios and whatnot. Once we got going at 3am though, minus a small but scary hiccup early in the journey, we got there safe and sound. We stayed at Maya Chalet, and for our 3day 2 night package which included island transfers, snorkeling trip (equipment and boat) and accommodation, we only paid rm140, which was a total bargain.

Our chalet was on coral bay, the chill, quiet side of the island, good for food and chilling out, but for swimming and playing on the beach, a short trek across the island to Long Beach is recommended. Long Beach is kind of the party beach though, so by dusk it was starting to get rowdy with bars and loud music and dancing, so we made our way back to our little haven where it was jack Johnson and calm waves all night long. Mafia wars that night after dinner and for the first round I was the mafia, and in the second round I was the angel. Fun times.

The next day after a morning stroll on the beach with Puteri and breakfast of twiggies and roti potato on an upside-down kayak, we hung out on Mye’s balcony and had second breakfast, before getting our flippers on and heading out for our snorkeling trip. This was by far the best snorkeling trip I’ve ever ever been on. Felt like I was swimming in an aquarium, so so many different types of colorful fishes, coral, and even sea turtles! we went to the shark point but unfortunately I didn’t see any sharks since I was too scared of swimming near the rocks (takut terhempas dgn ombak). swimming was so tiring but so completely absorbing once you got into the rhythm of breathing and paddling and following fishes around.

After snorkeling for a few hours we headed back to our island and had lunch, and then had some rest before hanging out on the balcony again. towards the late afternoon we all decided to go explore one of the other beaches, a more remote one called Romantic Beach lol. It wasn’t that good for swimming since there were lots of sea cucumbers which kind of grossed me out. Didn’t want to step on those slimy things. so I just sat on the beach, borak2, chilllllllll~

That night we had a bbq dinner, and it was deeeeelicious! I had shark (of the non-endangered boleh jumpa kt giant variety) which was soft and succulent. Cheap too! RM15 for the bbq set which included a meat of your choice (barracuda, barramundi, squid, blue marlin, stingray, prawn, lobster, chicken, etc2), choice of dipping sauce, rice, big slice of juicy watermelon and pineapple, a slice of banana cake, and drinks. Nyummmms :-9

That night we played ‘kotak beracun’ which is kind of like a pre-prepared truth or dare + hot potato. It was hilarious and I definitely learned a lot heheh. The next day we packed up and after a last bit of pictures-taking, headed back to the mainland.

We stopped by Kuala Terengganu to buy keropok lekor at Kg. Losong and then Pasar Payang for a bit, then started on our journey back to KL, which turned out to be quite the adventure. Kak. Fiza’s car started acting up, or rather, wouldn’t start, so we jump started it but it kept on dying, even after driving. That happened a lot of times and nighttime was closing in, and they couldn’t turn on the headlights because the car would die and we took the kampung road so there weren’t any rest stops along the way. Managed to slowly drive in convoy to meet up with An’s uncle who bought a replacement battery in Kuantan, and after that the car was ok, Alhamdulillah. Eventually reached KL at 3am, just around the time we left 🙂

8 June – textbook meeting which I came late to because I was so tired. eh wait. that’s true but also because I had to go meet our course coordinator and receive the bad news (will talk about this later)

9 June – Helped Salmoon clean up their new house. Tiring. Then Haneef has been wanting to get his glasses made, and for some reason insisted on waiting until I was available to go with him, so we went. That night we went to Mariam Sano’s Henna party. Dance dance. Well not so much. haha

bebola ikan said salman…

 10 June – Went to clean up the studio while waiting for the studio mates yg nak pergi visit Jannah and her baby in Shah Alam. Convoy around 7 cars because everyone was going home straight afterwards. Stopped by Faiz/Yeop/Paih/Boss’s house first where it was like raya, makanan penuh satu meja, kuih raya bagai. Nyums. Ate til our stomachs were bursting then headed over to Jannah’s to coo and gush over baby Qurratul Hayah.

kuih raya~
posing with the sleeping baby shhhhhh
little angel~

11 June – Finished cleaning up my stuff at the studio and loaded them up into the old Volvo, then makan2 and jalan2 at Wangsa Maju with the baby brother, then visited Yang at her house, chatted for quite a while, then drove brother home, then headed over to Ayesha’s for a surprise bday party bbq sleepover. Successfully manned the BBQ and it was the best bbq chicken I’ve ever had, hehehehe. Potato salad was scrumptious, and lots of laughs all around. Singing and eating and laughing, Good times.

muka selekeh semua orang yg baru habis berbbq

12 June – Went to UIA to settle some more stuff (more on that debacle later) then went back to Ayesha’s and just hung out. went to Dr. Cafe in the afternoon, then back to Ayesha’s for dinner (we call her house our holiday retreat. bliss!) then picked up my mom from work, and finally headed home where I finally got to talk to Muhsin who’s in Japan for three months, yay!

my girl, talkin bout myy girllll

13 June – ran around doing errands and driving people around and then finally got to the initial plan of the day which was the long awaited DOCTOR WHO MARATHON finallyyy!!! Picked up some (fake) jammy dodgers, lychee soda, and fish fingers, drove over to Aziza’s and made custard and fried the fish fingers, and made the TARDIS blue drink. Fish fingers and custard was actually not that bad. an acquired taste perhaps. then it was time to catch up on the last 4 episodes of the season. OMG.

jammy dodgers, homemade bounty bars, fish fingers and custard, tardis lychee drink, and episodes 😀

14 June – More driving people around and errands, had to save my mum from ISTAC because her car battery konked out. Felt extra manly this week because of the barbecues and driving and battery changing. Went to watch Man of Steel afterwards with Ilham, Nadiah and the Khatibs, can’t say I enjoyed the movie really. Actually felt quite bored.

15 June – Don’t know what got into me but I found myself in SS2 Mall early in the morning to attend an Improv Workshop held by AI:IA. Maybe because someone said it probably wasn’t my kind of thing I felt challenged:p maybe because I really was in the mood to try new things, maybe because the place was near food foundry and I’ve been wanting to get my hands on some mille crepe. I didn’t know what to expect at all, and came in to find people stretching like they were going to go for a run. erk. Turns out the stretching was a good idea because it turned out to be very..physical? I’m really glad I went though, it turned out to be really really fun and it was nice to meet new people and just be crazy with random strangers for a bit 😀 I enjoyed the last exercise the most, and apparently I was quite funny heehee ^_____^ Food Foundry afterwards where we split a smoked salmon sandwich and a pulled beef sandwich and ALMOND SALTED CARAMEL MILLE CREPE :9

pic from @iedilputra
heavenlyyyyyy..pic from

16 June – lazy dayyyy~ Spent most of it either online, asleep, eating, or reading. Picked up ‘The Prisoner of Heaven’ around 2.30 and finished it (including an hour long nap in between) at 6.30. Good books really are too short oftentimes. played the flash version of portal after maghrib but got stuck on level 14. researched Japan and got :/ over how expensive it is, then chatted, then played Zelda: A Link to the Past but kept dying although I did make progress and got to fight the boss before dying again, battery of the gameboy micro was dying and it was late but I felt like writing, and here we are.

Ethan keeps on dyinggggg

A fun, fulfilling, but very tiring week. it was awesome 🙂


My sister getting married last September made me realize that I was always part of a Force, it was always me and my sis, the Hamzah sisters, part of the Hamzah Family. Of course her getting married kind of changed that and now I’m just lonely me.

In our school, a lot of our friends were those kinds as well, a Family Force. There were the Khatibs, the Preeces, the Joneses, the Radwans, the Soualhis, the Sanos, the Ismaiels, the Manafs, the Khans, the Abullais’, the Shafiqs, the Tauseefs, the Ashours, the Elkhaldis, the Ghassans, etc.

And now we’re at that age where we’re starting to become the people who will be family friends ourselves. I don’t know if that makes sense, but that’s how I see it.

Last weekend my brother’s best friend got married to my sisters best friend. It seems kind of impossible that they didn’t know each other before Munira’s wedding, but that’s where they first met. 8 months later and they’re happily married. So surreal. Throughout the whole wedding weekend it felt like my actual sister was getting married to my brother, as weird as that sounds. Because they really are like family to me. I couldn’t be happier for them both 😀 Congratulations Zati and Lutfi!!! I had fun being a self appointed bridesmaid and unofficial photographer 🙂

more pics in the slideshow below 🙂

Today we had an appreciation bbq for us fifth years, as a way to say thanks to our supervisors and ‘assistants’. It was fun prepping the bbq, cooking, eating and chatting with my studio mates. cakap pasal macam2. Some dah secured jobs, some are applying, some are starting to look for houses. My plans after graduation are kind of sketchy, but mainly consists of chilling and traveling. maybe a small job just for fun. I’ve always wanted to work in a bookstore, or an assembly factory.

Towards the end of the night, we all gathered round for a game of mafia wars (which you can read about here) and even though I was already ready to go home, I decided to play one round. I’m quite proud  that my first guess was absolutely spot on. too bad no one really believed me so the tyrant lived well into the game.

But sitting in that misshapen circle and staring people down made me realize that, despite everything, I know I will miss this crazy bunch.

Its the final final stretch to the finish line, just have to submit my report and Insha’Allah I’ll be done with my thesis. Final presentation went alright, but more on that later. 🙂

Beginning of the end

*brushes aside cobwebs and dust*

I suddenly feel like blogging again. I probably won’t but it’s just a feeling. It’s the final stretch of my Final Semester of my Final year in B. Arch, 3 more weeks till I have to submit my design thesis. I’m nowhere near done and I don’t know if I will be come the 16th of May. In all honesty I should be working on it now but today has not been a good day.

I woke up late because last night I was up till quite late, trying to get a chapter written, and then my friend pinged me on gtalk and we talked about River and the Ponds and how complicated river’s timeline is.

River Song and the Doctor’s Timeline
L=R: Rory, Amy, Doctor, River

Didn’t really help that I was woken up in the middle of the night by my mom asking me where my brother’s overalls were. (?)

Woke up proper and found out our last kitten got hit by a car and had died.


That’s probably why I don’t feel like doing any work. My thesis is about animal welfare, but all our cats keep dying. Makes me feel like a phony.

In an attempt to make my life more interesting and to take my mind of Things, my weekends have been pretty packed as of late. Hanging out with friends, playing games, cooking, climbing up Tabur, white-water rafting, karaoke, concert-going and movie watching. It’s been fun, but at the same time, once the weekends are over, I sink back into stress and depression. it’s been getting slightly better but things happen and it triggers all the emo switches.

Beach and ikan bakar outing with the girls at bagan lalang

kfc and egg sandwich picnic. L-R: Nadiah, Ilham, Aziza, Hannat

watching the sunset then praying on the beach 🙂

Pies are quite leceh to make but very delicious. In conjunction with Pi-day (March 14th) Kd, Muz, Nirman and I baked some pies. the Tomyam chicken pot pie was especially tasty. we also made banana-mango pie and lemon cheese pie. recipes were taken from various online sources and tweaked.

If you’ve never played rockband, I think you definitely should. it’s a lot of fun and good for stamina and dexterity lol. I was terrible at drums but I think I did ok for a beginner on the bass..

Subuh on one weekend a bunch of friends and myself made our way up Bukit Tabur a.k.a the dinosaur in my backyard. this was my second time up and it was a lot of fun. It was great to be able to organize it and ajak my friends along too. Will definitely go again.

ulu kelang dam from one of the peaks
Me and Yang the trooper 🙂

I dont have a fear of heights but i admit, gayat sikit duduk sini

Photo by Umar Mita

After the descent from Tabur, went for some eats then got home and popped right back out again to make my way to KL Central where me, Ilham, Aziza and Hannat drank obscenely priced coffee at the Hilton cafe and Ilham casually asked Nick Carter for a quick photo like he was our friend or something. Then we dashed off to KLCC for the Twin Towers Alive 2013 concert and to fulfill our adolescent dreams. BSB were A M A Z I N G obviously, but what really surprised me was the number of males in the audience. I’d have thought it would be full of screaming fangirls, but about half the crowd were guys.


shockresistant7's BSBTTLive2013 album on Photobucket

Went white water rafting with Ilham and Nadiah in Slim River, Perak. It wasn’t as challenging as I thought it’d be, and I came out of the 3 hour session not really tired. It was a whole bunch of fun though, would definitely recommend it although it’s a bit pricey at rm180 per person..

one of the stops along the way
Nadiah and I

At a hot spring we stopped by otw back. L-R: Sian Tze, Ilham, Me, K.Nini, Nadiah

after the last crit session Mye, Jedot, Mimi and myself drove off to Danau for some stress relief in karaoke. the place was super cheap but it was still ok. I didn’t sing too much firstly because I needed to save my voice for Sunday and secondly because I didn’t know half the songs they picked. aheh. the next Sunday I went for karaoke again, this time with ilham, hannat, aziza and nadiah at redbox in pavilion. a lot nicer and fancier but also much more expensive. they had a buffet which was good, and we were there for 4 hours singing our hearts out. It was actually a surprise birthday party for aziza, which I forgot about and was taken by surprise when a birthday song started playing all of a sudden and some guy brought in a cake. Loads of fun.

Its election season now

Holiday to do list

Ok I’m procrastinating again. My exams are not over yet but I already have a list of thing I want to/have to do this holiday 😀 I have a month. I’m sure i’m being over ambitious, but here it is, in no particular order:

  1. Sew something! because i’m a total absolute noob, probably something simple. like a handkerchief. haha. ok maybe a pouch/purse thing.
  2. Continue to work on my knitting/crocheting – even out the stitches, edges, and make something instead of just incomplete pocket squares which turn out looking like triangles.
  3. Write more – here, there, everywhere. to myself, to friends. on this blog.
  4. Sketch things – whatever ideas i have basically. could be about the above mentioned projects, architecture, crafts or anything else. 
  5. Papercrafts – make cards and other fun things
  6. Clean my room – ohoho yes
  7. Fix my clock face – its broken so i want to make a pretty new one
  8. Organise my year by putting things into a calender
  9. Maybe tinker with this blog design
  10. Research on highrise – services, structures, examples, green tech applicable, materials, case studies
  11. Do the assignment madam told us to do – what setbacks i experienced this year, how i plan to improve upon them, and what my expectations are for B.Arch
  12. I also want to travel
  13. Hang out with friends. this can be done together with item no.12
  14. Bake. or make bagels.
  15. Finish my Zelda game. By finish I mean win, of course. Come on Ethan you can do it!!
  16. Continue those french lessons I long abandoned.
  17. read more Qur’an and its translations – review those surahs that are fading /have faded from memory 

The mysterious land of tears

written on the 25th of June 2011

Yesterday night i watched Pheobe in wonderland, thinking it was going to be a happy and whimsical movie. It wasnt. not to say it wasn’t good, but i cried a lot watching it. A lot of emotion in that one, or stuff that i could somehow relate to. There was a scene where Pheobe’s mother goes on this outburst. i didnt cry at that part but it was startling how much i could relate to her. not what she was saying, because a lot of it was about motherhood, but how she was feeling. because she’d feel something and that would cause a domino effect of contradicting feelings. And thats what i go through a lot. Another thing is that elle fanning is very very talented. its a good movie, not excellent, but subtle. if you have the chance you must watch it

I remember watching an episode of glee, and crying at one scene. it sounds silly even as i say it but it was the scene where Artie and Brittany broke up. I cried because of what artie said, and then because of what he called brittany. but mostly it was what he said, about not being able to handle not being her everything.

one of our kittens died last week, oreo. i found out as i was leaving the house to go watch super 8. we came home and buried it under a palm tree in front of our house, next to mocha’s grave. All our other cats attended the funeral and were meowing. it broke my heart again. today i found out that cookie died, from my brother’s tweet. i cried. and then i went and asked muhsin if he already buried her, and he said, yea, he buried her and poodle. and i couldnt take it. i cried some more. and i could tell muhsin had been crying as well and it broke my heart. he was the one who nursed the kittens, brought them to the vet, fed them and cared for them the most. and on his birthday, two of his little babies pass away. :'(

its sadder than when mocha died because mocha got hit by a car, there was nothing we couldve done to prevent that, except lock him up, but that would be cruel. but for the kitties, we were all so busy so we couldnt care for them as well as we should have, they were sick, and quite thin. we didnt do enough for them. we didnt love them enough. we failed. I failed. and it breaks my heart that the cats have to stay outside because i can tell they miss us, and they want to be petted and hugged like they used to. but they arent.

I can’t stand not being enough. I hate being a dissapointment.

sometimes i repeat a phrase over and over in my head and sometimes i even mumble them quietly. today i spent a whole 5 minutes saying “toomuchdeathtoomuchdeathtoomuchdeathtoomuchdeathtoomuchdeathtoomuchdeath”
and sometimes my reflections talk to me. well its really just my head but today all the mirrors told me “you’re not good enough. just not good enough”

I’m thawing out slowly, but sometimes i forget that feelings come in all sorts of shapes and sizes and forms. but the Happy more than makes up for the sad.

Showdown of Champions, KL 2008

As Shirley Bassey so aptly sang, “Where do I begin?”

My birthday was on the 17th, but the 18th was what i was really excited about and looking forward to, so ignoring the big 21, here goes!

Meet and Greet/Autograph session, KLCC foyer

Yesterday went beyond all my expectations, which were, to begin with, already great. So in the morning Zah, Nadiah and I stood for about 2 hours in line waiting for Roger Federer to arrive, and even though the encounter was brief, and by brief I mean really brief, it was great. Even standing in line we were entertained by the presence of a Federer lookalike, which we learned later on was an Iranian who lived in the USA, he was there with his mother. His name was Zaher Khan, also found that out later.

It must be weird, for famous people. Many people they meet tend not to look them in the eye, instead, they point a camera straight in their face. That was one mistake I did in the meet and greet. Couldn’t really savor the moment because I was flustered and didn’t know what to do. Missed a lot by seeing through the camera display rather than using my eyes. Didn’t really repeat the mistake in the match.

this picture appeared on gettyimages, with the hilarious caption of “Roger Federer (C) of Switzerland signs autographs for a Malaysian Muslim fan…”

After the meet-and-greet (aptly named, as that’s all you did. Meet, say hi, and then you get shooed away) we were standing outside KLCC towers all giddy and beaming like overexcited children, and for some reason Bernama decided to interview us. God knows what nonsense we were jabbering on about because we didn’t get to see ourselves, not that we’d want to anyway. They also interviewed lookalike and his mom before us (that’s where we found out his name).

After all that excitement, it was a case of “now what..?”

So we wandered back inside and into the mall, where we were walking around when suddenly, I turn to say something to Nadiah and who else do I see but Mirka? Funny, because we were just speaking about maybe bumping into her in KLCC. She was taller and prettier and more down-to-earth than we imagined, but she declined any pictures taken. Respect that. What I found most odd was how she seemed to be wandering aimlessly around the mall, all alone. Well, except for the freaky couple that was silently stalking her.

Showdown of Champions, Stadium Putra, Bukit Jalil

Left the mall at 4 to beat the rush hour, even if that meant we’d get to Bukit Jalil ridiculously early. Hung around the Putra stadium observing the weird people around, pointing out people we recognized from the autograph signing, like South Africa hat dude +family, lady who needed to “meet someone,” guy with stripey blue shirt, Jason Mraz hat guy, cowbell lady, dude with plaid hat, lookalike and mom, etc. oh we also saw Hans Isaac, weird again because we were, for some reason, talking about him that day also. Saw a really lost looking dude who was walking aimlessly around the complex alone. Weird.

Waited for Ilham and Ayesha to arrive, since they were stuck in traffic. Meanwhile, we walked around the stadium looking for where the players would arrive/exit from, so that we could stalk them when they left. Found it with no trouble at all. They finally arrived at 7, so we entered the arena, prayed marghrib, and went into the seating area where our ears were blasted to smithereens from screechy Ella singing. Jacklyn Victor was a bit more tolerable, as was Ning Baizura. But who cares about them, its tennis we came to see! Other people we spotted inside were mostly some other political people. I chatted with this family from Alberta, Canada. I told her I used to live in Canada too, in Waterloo, and apparently she went to university there! Also some weird guy started chatting me up when I went down to take some pictures after the match. Freaky.

The first match was with the old timers, Bjorn Borg and Jon McEnroe. McEnroe being the feisty one, always playing up the crowds with his antics, as per usual! It was all in good fun. There was some racquet throwing, ref-slamming and ball-boy teasing which really cracked us up. Borg was more reserved. Watching them play, I thought, this is a lot different than what I’m used to seeing on the telly. Its much slower paced and not as aggressive. But then again they are old so I guess that’s why. McEnroe won that 1 set match in a tie break.

Three short minutes later, the real reason people came to the match started. It was James Blake vs Roger Federer, which was absolutely amazing to watch. It seemed so surreal watching a live tennis match, the movements so familiar and yet it was different, because it was right in front of our face, live. Everything was really just so surreal. And it was awesome seeing a master at work, you could tell he was a genius in his element, so exquisite and graceful, that one. Watching live, you get more of a feel and understanding of how different the players’ styles are, their temperament, personality, quirks. Federer was the elegant and graceful one, full of finesse and sweeping movements and nimble ballet-esque footwork. One thing I heard but never did on telly was his cute “aiya” when he’d mess up a shot. Blake was more aggressive and hard hitting, but both were absolutely brilliant. Federer won that match, also in a tie-break, much to the crowd delight, especially the cowbell lady et al, who (I gathered from their view-blocking banner) were Asian rogerfederer.commers. Which, come to think of it, so am I.

Another thing, I noticed that anything the players say on court can really be heard by almost everybody, at least up to where we were seated, midway up the stands. And its not even shouted, just things said normally. So imagine what it must be like if Nadal or Sharapova were in the house, grunting and shrieking all the way? By the way, next year instead of Federer et al, Miss Sharapova will be gracing our shores, opponent not yet confirmed. Big Whoop. Guys should be glad I suppose.

The final match of the night was a single set doubles, Europe vs. USA, with Roger pairing up with Bjorn and Blake with McEnroe. That match was super exciting. Fast paced, a lot of laughs from us and the players, and all in all a really exhilarating match. In the end USA came out on top 7-5, so the only person who didn’t win anything was poor old Borg.

We planned on stalking the players back to the hotel but then it was already late and some of us had work the next morning. Also, it wouldn’t be that easy this time, like it was during the CYC because these people had a whole convoy and police escort whereas at the CYC it was just a bus. Went to Ilham’s house feeling dazed and giddy and happy all at the same time.

So to Federer, Blake, Borg and McEnroe, a HUGE thank you for coming to Malaysia and giving us something to buzz about for a long time to come! You guys made my day! And last but definitely not least, Thank you to Nadiah and her dad for giving us all the opportunity to witness a genius at work!!

Pictures, videos, and links
hcfoo’s tennis blog
NST article
The Star article


…kind of sucked. I was planning on studying at least as much as I did yesterday, keep the momentum and all. But I guess yesterday I went all out and today it’s like I was burned out so I couldn’t even look at my notes. Didn’t help that in the morning I realized that something was wrong with my email, that I was apparently spamming people and myself. its weird, all these old messages I sent to people were re-sent and also sent back to me(or so it seemed) I got freaked out and the only thing I could think of was changing my password, which didn’t help. So I went and deleted ALL my emails, from like 3 years ago, ones which I have kept, archived, and starred. All, gone. I hope that does the trick but I’m still not sure. So far it seems fine, I mean, there’s nothing for that virus/hacker to resend, is there?

Never thought that this would happen to me, but it just goes to show it can happen to anyone. So I went on this mission to de-register myself from sites which I registered but don’t use/need. And one of them was this site called perfspot which I don’t even remember registering for. It’s some sort of networking site. Idiotically, I spent 20 minutes exploring the site looking for a “delete my account” link or button but there was none. There was no help page either. Only later when I clicked on suggestions was there a link to the help forum. I went there, and I found that many people had the same problem. They wanted to delete their accounts but didn’t know how. And the admin never replied to these threads either. Google came to the rescue again, though, this time through yahoo answers. Apparently the only way to delete the account is to email them asking them to delete it for you, and giving your reasons. To me, that’s enough of a reason to go ahead and terminate.

Praying that this problem will go away and never come back, and that my exams go well. No, not just well, excellently 🙂

oh, and please read my previous post, just in case. so far the subject of the spam is DEAR FRIEND, so delete that if you got it from me.


In studio last Friday one of my classmates came up to me and said someone needed to see me in the deputy dean’s office, right now. Okay, I thought. Even though I had no idea where the deputy dean’s office was. So I went to my studio master to get permission to leave the studio, and when I told her I had to go see someone in the deputy dean’s office, she said, “Why? What did you do?”

What did I do? I did something? Something wrong? Now I was freaked out. I don’t recall ever doing anything remotely compoundable by the kulliyyah or anything else, so far this semester I’ve only skipped one non-kulliyyah class, but anyways, I asked my lecturer where the office was and she told me.

When I got there (it was in the main office. Duh) I was made to wait a fair bit before that person came out, carrying a big brown envelope and some smaller ones. I relaxed a bit then, because the small envelopes were not letter sized, so it probably wasn’t a warning letter or anything.

Turns out I got an invitation to some program in the C.A.C that will be held on October 13th at 8p.m. I’m going, but I don’t know anyone else who is, so it might be a lonely dinner for me. Even worse if I’m seated with a bunch of freaky guys. But hopefully not. If any of you are going please let me know! This is what the invite looks like (its gold-edged!)

6 degrees

My social networking skills were called into play a few days ago – a friend asked me if I knew any service apartments and if I knew where to find a DJ since her friend wanted to throw a party.
Service apartment? The only one I know is the Ascott where we stalked the Manchester United youth team last summer. That is near KLCC, and will probably be very expensive.
DJ? Well… one of my friends met and fell in love with a DJ in Sunway, but that’s all I have.
She then asked if I knew this other girls’ phone number since she had a party recently, but I had no idea. But I could refer her to another friend with more contacts…
I asked her when the party was going to be held and she replied, “Tomorrow..!”


At my cousin’s wedding some of her sister’s friends were also there and they asked me where I studied. I told them in UIA, and in Architecture. Turns out her sister was my classmate… They were in the Kuantan campus, and I asked if they knew my Malay classmate, and they did…

The Homecoming

Firstly, I’m sorry the pictures aren’t up yet – Facebook refuses to upload my pictures for some odd reason.

Many of my classmates are back from their overseas studying, so today we had a mini-reunion in the middle of the hustle and bustle that was Mamma Mia. For the uninitiated, Mamma Mia is an eatery in IIUM where many students choose to hang out for lunch in. This is because not only is it air-conditioned (not that you can feel it when its packed) it also caters to international tastes, i.e. people who can’t eat spicy food. Prices are on the steep side for students, but most are willing to pay albeit grumbling a bit. The lady at the cashier always seems apologetic when quoting prices, but oh well. Bagging a table is a matter of great importance if you plan on eating in the air-conditioning as by 12.30 it starts to fill up extremely fast, and by 2 it empties out. You can usually see the same faces there every day but once in a while you get fresh blood, always recognizable by their raised eyebrows, widened eyes and generally incredulous looks when reaching the cashier.

Anyways, I arrived at our mini reunion quite late since I had no idea it was going on. So in the end I only spent 15 minutes with my friends before huffing off to studio, but not before indulging in an Oreo J.Co. These things are dangerous. Before, if you wanted J.Co donuts, you’d have to drag yourself all the way to Pavillion to satisfy your cravings. Now, every time there is any sort of fest/carnival/stall setup in IIUM, a J.Co stall sprouts up. This time its even worse, because there are two. One in my Kulliyyah, KAED, and one in the Center near the bridge. Also there is a Big Apple stall. All these factors do not positively contribute to any weight loss diet anyone might have, but as for myself, yes, I might gain weight, but at what artery clogging cost? Today I was guilty of binging on two donuts, Oreo and banana-choc. Yesterday I had Tiramisu, as I did the day before. Come to think of it, my sugar intake has been abnormally high this week. I’ve had chocolate for breakfast on three straight days, plus a handful of sour nerds every time I get back to my room. then of course the donuts. and the other day I bought mango juice which was half sugar water. Oh and in my desperate attempt to stay awake in class, I finished 3/4 of a sour mentos tube.

Falling asleep in class. I seem to be doing that regularly these days, and I don’t know why. Its extremely annoying because the moment the lecturer opens his/her mouth, I get drowsy, and the moment class is over I’m fresh as a daisy. Add to this the fact that I always sit in front (supposedly so I can pay attention) which means any nodding of the head or drooping of the eyelids is blatantly obvious to the lecturers if they cared to look up. I have tried almost everything – eating candy in class, texting. doodling. writing, squirming in my seat, even trying to strike up a sleepy conversation with my neighbor. None of them work more than a few seconds. I’d like to blame on my lack of sleep last week due to so many assignments but I have to see if next week is any different to make any conclusion.

This post was supposed to be about my classmates returning. But I haven’t really talked to them yet. Oh but I did go out to the airport to fetch Nadiah, along with Ilham and Ayesha. I love going to the airport., but thats another topic altogether. Anyways Nadiah told us her adventure with MAS which left us feeling “how in the world did that happen!?”

Finding a lunch buddy is getting harder as the semester progresses. Not everyone has time or wants to have lunch anymore, but I need to have lunch or else I’ll starve. And I hate eating alone. Especially in UIA.

I looked up ‘drowsiness’ and being a hypochondriac, I believe I’m suffering from Narcolepsy

Fun, and then craziness

I have a cold, resulting from either eating rambutans or from the rain and a/c combo. Or both.

On Friday I woke up at 3.45a.m. To get ready for our site analysis trip to Lumut. We were supposed to be in front of KAED at 4.45 a.m. got there just in time, groggy and freezing, and boarded the bus, which was like a freezer! Drove for about an hour and then stopped in Rawang for Subuh prayers. Drove some more and stopped somewhere for breakfast. Then we drove some more till we got to Kellie’s Castle. My mom was telling me about it when we went to Sentul, how the old abandoned house there reminded her of the Castle. But that place was gorgeous! So out of the blue. In front of it was a river flowing calm and steady, and then the castle itself. You can read the full sad story behind it here, although the version that is posted up in the castle is slightly different.

I never knew I was afraid of heights until I went there. Usually I just feel like jumping, be it my hostel or the KLCC sky bridge. But here there were no rails to prevent you from tumbling over. But it was an awesome experience all the same. Oh, Perak is lovely by the way; I just love the calm feeling of the place, so contrasting from the madness of the Klang Valley. The mountain/hills, caves, and especially the vast expanses of land.

After Kellie’s Castle we headed to UTP, and this is another awesomely gorgeous place but in a totally different way. Just as a measure of comparison, their Chancellery building won the Aga Khan Award! What I loved most was their library, mind boggling when you first set eyes on it but ingeniously simple when you see how it’s done. I was going to meet up with some friends there but didn’t get the chance to. Oh well, next time. We prayed at the UTP mosque (the one I had to draw for my Graphics assignment) and then finally made our way to Teluk Batik where our chalets awaited.

Chalets. Don’t they sound charming? Believe me they were not. Livable, but only just. The toilet was a mess and that night we didn’t have any water supply, so we had to trek out to the public loo some ways away. Awkward coz the boys used the public toilet right next to it. One evening I was going to the washroom by myself, and like always I looked around at stuff, but when I looked ahead, these two boys had just emerged from the showers. They were only in their towels, poor things. Must’ve been embarrassing. So I turned around and let them have their peace/space.

Oh right behind our chalet there were two horses. All they did was eat, so we mustered up some courage to go and pet them the darker one, Along, was sweet and came to us to be petted. The chestnut one, Angah, was a sour old Meanie that snapped his teeth when we tried to give him a loving pet. Sheesh.

The chalets were quite near the beach, so that was good. Being all enthusiastic, my housemates and I went straight out to the beach after we dumped our things in the room. The wind was so strong and refreshing! Kicked off our shoes and waded across a small stream to the other side of the shore. Big mistake. The wind blew my shoes and my friends slippers and wallet into the murky stagnant stream =0 so began our adventure of trying to retrieve our belongings and in the end Missy was our hero of the day after recovering all the flotsam and jetsam. One of my shoes was quite dry since they floated, but one bobbed upside down so was wet. Thus I went around the whole of Lumut (and Pangkor and Pasir Salakand back to KL) in my bathroom slippers.

Our site was a park by the waterfront at Lumut jetty. Nothing much to say about it except it has some potential but is poorly maintained. The second day we spent the whole morning analyzing it. In the afternoon we went to the mangrove park and were hounded by monkeys. At night we ate out at some unreasonably priced place across from the naval place.

Third day we had to check out by 8.30, so we did and then went to Pangkor. Not for long though, just a short tour round the island, which I would recommend only because of the amazing rollercoaster-like roads there. And the beaches of course.

Then went to Pasir Salak to the museum of history of Perak (or something – we were rushing since it was actually already closed so didn’t get a name or any pics) lovely place and awesome dioramas which make you feel like you’re there if you stare long enough. Outside the museum they decided to have a durian party, I personally did not join in but instead feasted on goreng pisang courtesy of Ilda and rambutans courtesy of Mdm. Zaiton. Got on the bus (which now was like a freezer filled with durian ice cream) and went to Tapah rest stop for maghrib. We went to Tapah mainly to look at the bathrooms and surau actually. It was raining so hard there and we got soaked. Had maggi for dinner, got on the bus and tried to sleep but the smell and the cold were too much. Soaked + freezing bus +durian smells + unwashed rambutan = sickly feeling and a cold. Got back to my hostel at 11, immediately did my laundry and died on my bed at around 12.45

Next day I had to submit 15 sketches of the trip. Thank God Madam said we only needed to come to studio in the afternoon session and not at 9.

Tuesday had to submit a Building construction & Materials report as well as present it (group work)

Wednesday had to submit an environmental services assignment as well as an intro to landscape architecture report

Friday was the presentation of the site analysis and also submission of our project A, a 24” x 24” painting. On Thursday I managed to stumble back to my far-away hostel room at around 5.30 a.m. even though my work was done by 3 a.m., i had to wait for the others to finish up so I could read their parts. spent that time cleaning the studio with Ilda and harassing the first years. btw, its amazing, KAED, at 5 am every floor is still full of people. Funny looking at their haggard faces. especially the first years. Lol.

Crazy! After Friday I thought I’d be able to relax a little bit, but no.

Monday have to submit another 5 nice sketches of the trip, A3 size. Also have to have gone and studied at least 2 art galleries complete with reports. Also have to re-do site analysis for our own personal use. Also must have a preliminary design idea or bubble diagram.

Tuesday I have anther BCM report/presentation due

Wednesday must submit our CAD 3S assignment. I don’t know how I’m going to do that since I don’t have the software on my computer. Need to then print it, bind it (hardcover!) and make sure it looks professional.

Pictures of the trip to follow soon so check back in a while…

Back to square one

Went out yesterday to buy a new camera since our old one got stolen. My dad had already picked one out, a Panasonic Lumix DMC-FS3, which was almost similar to our old one, but still different.

My older brother told me to research other cameras as well. So I did and ended up with several options, the most promising one was the Canon Powershot A580. Both of the cameras were for RM799.00. Finally got out of the house at 3.30pm, and went off to Times Square to park. My brother wanted to go to Low Yat but I preferred looking around in Times Square First. After browsing around for ages we actually made up our minds around 5 separate times.

1. A really cool Panasonic , can’t remember the model, for RM999, but later we found out it didn’t come with a battery or memory card

2. A Sony Cybershot for RM899, but that didn’t come with a memory card either.

3. A Nikon P60 – never really in my eyes but my sister seemed to like it.

4. A Canon Powershot A590IS for RM850

5. Finally just went for the original Panasonic my dad told us to buy…

Here is a side-by-side comparison of those cameras.

Watched Hancock afterwards. Don’t know what to say about the movie. It was weird…

totally unrelated – an interesting post

three out of eight

…managed to do 3/8 of the things on my to-do on Saturday list.

First went to KLCC Convention Center with my older brother to the Post grad Asia fair. Not much there really. Then helped my little brother with his gift shopping. Then went to KLPAC to fetch my sister, and while we were there we hung around for a bit.

Let me tell you something about KLue Urbanscapes that maybe the starry-eyed failed to notice, just didn’t care about, or closed one eye to.

There were loads of people. Many of them were smoking. You’re thinking, big deal, yeah? Well not only that.

A lot of them were guzzling Heineken and Tiger Beer which was readily available. Tiger was also one of the Main sponsors of the event. I don’t know about you but even though I was born and lived in the West for almost half my life, I’ve never been to an event where people drank in the midst of everyone else, and thank God.

Not to sound all preachy, but aren’t we not supposed to have anything to do with alcohol consumption? It’s bad enough that our local super/hypermarkets have a section and I know I’m not fully free from guilt myself since newspapers and magazines also run lager-related ads, but to parade it off as the cool thing to do? (Urbanscapes is supposed to be where all the cool people hang out – the ones in the loop and all that)

On a lesser note, they held the acoustic sessions upstairs, while the head-banging, booty shakin’ party music was played downstairs, right next to the Surau. So anyone wanting to go pray (i.e. me and my brothers) would have a thumping headache from the deep and loud beats emanating out the open door.

I wasn’t there long so I might have missed a lot of things, but anyways, this is what I experienced. Had to walk with extra caution, scooting and squeezing myself small trying to avoid the drinking throngs. Blinking through all the smoke and rain(not that I’m complaining about the rain part, it lessened the smoke effect slightly) Marketplace was nice if not for the crowd, smoke (it was covered so no rain) and again, alcohol.

Just my humble opinion.

Read my sisters more glowing review here


Watched “The Incredible Hulk” today, at the insistence of my brothers, coupled with the refusal of my sister to sit through “Kung-Fu Panda” and the lack of anything else to watch. The movie was LOUD. Had to stick my fingers in my ears more than several times. The only saving grace was Edward Norton, who I like anyway. Liv Tyler, oh my god, breathy voice is annoying!

Tomorrow I have so many things/places/events lined up that I need to choose from:

RA FlashMob
Butterfly Park with Nada and Sumeyra
Watch “Wanted” with Aziza
Go Out with Ayesha (can be combied with aziza)
Help my brother with his gift shopping
Accompany my other brother to some Post Grad education Fair in KLCC – can be combined with gift shopping with lil bro..
Stay at home and clear out my messy room

Honestly don’t know which one i will pick..(or can actually go to..)

Exploration and Discovery

I think in my previous entry I mentioned how I was done with my exams. Today however, my Intro to Built Environment class had an assignment to do, Urban Trail, which brought us to Petaling Street and Jalan Masjid India. It was my first time in Petaling Street, much to the surprise of our senior who was acting as our guide.

Let’s just say the day was full of discoveries, not necessarily related to the assignment itself. Actually, not related to the assignment at all. This much I’ll say, innocence can be deceiving – and I should know. On the flipside, you can’t judge a person on certain actions that they do, however disgusting those actions are. Somewhere, sometime, that person is better than you. Another piece of reflection – someone’s good image can go out in smoke in a matter of seconds, just the same amount of time it takes for impressions to be dashed. Also, some people are quite contradictory, even within themselves. Chivalry vs. destruction and disregard, for example.

Ok. Enough for now.


Role reversal

So in our household there is somewhat of an oddity at works. My brothers love to cook (ok, one of them loves to, the others like it more than I do), and I am particularly averse to standing anywhere near the kitchen stove. On the other hand, I am quite enamored with any kind of hardware/tool. Screwdriver. Compass. Spirit level. Power drill. Yum!

Our house seems to have a doorknob demon; so far 4 doorknobs have messed up. Twice in my brothers room, once my parents, and most recently (just now) our doorknob refused to open. My brothers’ room was really ok; they had a connecting bathroom so they could still get in and out of their room. All we have is a balcony and no way are we going to climb out of it every day to get in/out. But no worries, this is just the sort of thing I relish. out come the assortment of makeshift tools (I lost or misplaced my screwdriver in my incredibly messy room) so it was palette knives (the very same and new ones we gave my sis for her birthday and this is their first service to us lol) and scissors and a compass to the rescue.

My brother soon joined us through the balcony. He climbed out of his balcony and walked across the roof to ours. What was funny was the neighbors thought he was a thief/intruder, plus he was carrying two steak knives. Anyways in the end i didn’t need the knives, just a pair of (t)rusty old scissors. Pushed out the knob and pulled in the….thingy. haha. Doorknobs-0, Maryam-2.5. ( i helped my brother with their second doorknob disaster before). Of course now we have a hole in our door where the doorknob should be, but at least we can get in and out 😛

on a totally unrelated note, I Love this song!!!! its such a good song if you’re feeling depressed or sad, because when you are feeling like that you don’t want some sunshine-rainbows-butterflies song to make you feel better. you need something like this. exactly. by the way, i would’ve uploaded a live version but there wasn’t one that was good enough in quality. so take a really good listen because it is worth it. they are both perrfect.

Sewing Machine/Details in the Fabric

by Jason Mraz feat James Morrison

Calm down
Deep breaths
And get yourself dressed instead
Of running around
And pulling all your threads and
Breaking yourself up

If it’s a broken part, replace it
But, if it’s a broken arm then brace it
If it’s a broken heart then face it

And hold your own
Know your name
And go your own way
Hold your own
Know your own name
And go your own way

And everything will be fine
Everything will be fine

Hang on
Help is on the way
Stay strong
I’m doing everything

Hold your own
Know your name
And go your own way
Hold your own
Know your name
And go your own way

And everything, everything will be fine

Are the details in the fabric
Are the things that make you panic
Are your thoughts results of static cling?

Are the things that make you blow
Hell, no reason, go on and scream
If you’re shocked it’s just the fault
Of faulty manufacturing.

Yeah everything will be fine
Everything in no time at all

Hold your own
And know your name
And go your own way

Are the details in the fabric (Hold your own, know your name)
Are the things that make you panic
Are your thoughts results of static cling? (Go your own way)

Are the details in the fabric (Hold your own, know your name)
Are the things that make you panic (Go your own way)
Is it Mother Nature’s sewing machine?

Are the things that make you blow (Hold your own, know your name)
Hell no reason go on and scream
If you’re shocked it’s just the fault (Go your own way)
Of faulty manufacturing

Everything will be fine
Everything in no time at all
Hearts will hold

In a land far, far away…..

T watched the second installment of The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince caspian, today. it was ok..some parts were good, some ok, some…cliched, it was after all a disney movie. i was given the feeling it was meant to be an emotional journey for the characters, but the only part in which they really succeeded in thoroughly portraying these emotions was their sense of desperate longing for narnia, how they missed it and their sadness in knowing that it was all temporary.

The Brazilian word ‘saudades’ is described as “it is a deep feeling of longing for someone or someplace, which is very sweet but also tinged with an inescapable sadness” (definition provided years ago by Antonio Carlos Jobim). It is this feeling that i so very often feel, and this movie captured that feeling very subtly, from beginning to the end.

The end credit song by regina spektor perfectly captures the mood, and was such a great way to end an otherwise just ok movie. it was like a wonderful surprise present. my sister andi were sitting there, thinking, we know that voice. we love that voice. yea for regina! in most of the other emotional scenes i was just an observer, and once or twice actually burst out laughing…more later

p/s: go listen to the song – its called “the call”
Regina Spektor – The Call

hmm so far i have edited this post 4 times…and i expect to do more soon. i guess its a testament to the movie, it made me think about stuff…

3rd times a charm…

It’s Shakira’s birthday tomorrow so we all went out, me, Sumeyra, Hiba, Nada, and Shakira, to Sunway pyramid. the whole journey alone took an hour and a half – but we were on a mission. Today, we would go ice skating!!! YEA!!!! hehe last time i skated was when i was 7, my god how embarassing for a canadian, only skated twice in her life. Today marked the third time i was on the ice. Nada didn’t want to at first, after seeing the people on the rink as well as Sumeyra’s unhelpful gore story of how someone’s fingers were sliced off by the blades. but Hiba bought her tix anyways so she was forced to. anyhow i assured her nothing bad would happen, and showed her that “see, the skates aren’t even sharp!”

at first i had to get used to being all wobbly and slippery, getting my ice-legs or whatever. and the skates were kinda tight. pinchy. but after a while i kinda got the hang of it and had a load of fun. Sumeyra left us all and went off at first – come on we all know you know how you’re canadian/turkish! help us out! i fell down 4 times, all right after touching Sumeyra – she must be jinxed or something. the first time hurt, but only for a while. the second time hurt the most. third time was funny cos i kinda slid-fell and ended up lying eagle spread on the ice, laughing my head off. then finally the last fall gave me wet clothes as the ice was melted at that time. but even falling was fun..btw Hiba is really good at skating, very steady and smooth and fast enough…

we skated for about 3 hours then had lunch at wendy’s…yea after seeing so many ads in canada i wondered what it actually tastes like. but the burgers were puny sized. baked potatoes were nice though, but not salty enough. then while waiting for nada and hiba (who went off to satisfy their chocoholicism) we watched the people skating. there was this one girl with beautiful orange hair, all wild, looking like a hippie/gypsy/irish lass/free spirit and she was super nice, helping people out and teaching them how to skate even though she didnt know them. she was a good enough skater, but she fell once, slid and fell, and was also laughing.

must must go again….