Food – A love/hate relationship

If you know me personally you know I’m what some would call ‘skinny’. I’m around 5’2″ with a slight frame and I currently weigh 43 kg. I am definitely underweight and I know it. Not that I like being so light and wispy. A few months ago I’d been going on a steady 45kg, I was at that weight for more than 5 years with very little ups and downs. The heaviest I’ve ever ever been was 47kg in my third year, when we went for heritage studies.

It’s not like I don’t try to gain weight, I really have tried. but the pounds don’t seem to stick. A few months ago there was a health screening thing in UIA and I went just for fun. My metabolism rate was off the charts, and according to the guy at the booth, it’s because of my irregular sleeping pattern and irregular mealtimes. Ideally, I should be around 50kg (although the reading below said 54..I can’t imagine being over 50. Masa 47 pun dah tercungap2 naik tangga kaed..)

BMR- thats my body’s metabolic rate

My dilemma is this:
When people eat, they usually feel energized, yea? Not me. When I get hungry and remember to eat, I get extremely drowsy and sluggish afterwards. it’s not even funny. if you ask any of my teachers/lecturers/classmates since high school they’ll know I slept in just about every single class.

I’m also..lazy and forgetful when it comes to eating. If I’m at home in my room doing work or whatever, I’d usually forget to eat, and when I do remember at the end of the day or in the afternoon, I tend to be all ‘I’m too lazy to go all the way downstairs and cook something..and I’m not that hungry anyways.’

When I don’t eat, I will eventually get very tired and can’t do work due to lack of energy (obviously) but when I do eat, I get super sleepy and can’t really function as well. So, to eat or not to eat?

Being the paranoid person I am, I’m half certain that I have either narcolepsy or some weird gluten allergy/celiac disease or that there’s something wrong with my blood. I mean, I know I have low blood pressure but maybe my oxygen count is low or I don’t have enough blood or what. hmhmhm

I suppose one problem might be what I’m eating and when I’m eating it. I rarely have breakfast which I know, is the most important meal of the day (at least that’s what everyone says) and usually only have either lunch or dinner, and at irregular times. So in an effort to make myself more food-disciplined, a friend suggested I keep a food journal. it’s been 3 days since I started and immediately it’s obvious that I skip breakfast and I tend to snack a lot. In our household, we usually cook with less oil and less salt because its healthier, but on my part I’m very picky about what I eat. I only eat certain veggies and only if they’re fresh, etc2.

Need to start taking care of myself because who else is gonna do that. Also probably need to learn how to cook. 😐 And exercise/be more active.

Healthy me Insha’Allah (right after I finish my thesis >.< )

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